Ramblings on becoming a mom...

I've had nearly 16 weeks (since I found out I was pregnant SO early) now to absorb the fact that in a mere 20-ish weeks plus or minus a few days I will take on a new role in my life... that of a mom, mommy, mama or whatever our little child decides to call me. And I have finally hit the point of no return - maternity clothes. I'm wearing them in full force. My normal clothing does not fit me anymore. The few pants that had always been a bit big literally cut my stomach in half and make me look ridiculous... not to mention leaving marks on me where they are obviously too tight.

I won't deny the fact that I am SCARED beyond all belief - Will I make a good mom? Will I be able to support my kiddo financially, emotionally, physically? Will I survive on very little sleep (since I love it so)? Wait, lets take a step back - first fear: LABOR. I have told Rob all along that I would like to have as natural of a delivery as possible, un-medicated. I am not opposed to medication, but if I can keep myself calm, (God, mom and Rob help me) and have no serious complications - the goal from the get-go and forward is to labor without medicine - Wish me luck on that one. So once I get past that fun stuff (not), then we can skip to realtime fears that I mentioned first.

With all the uncertainty and fear I have I am extremely EXCITED because there are a few things I can say for sure about this little babe. He/she was and is wanted, he/she will be LOVED unconditionally, and that dad and I are going to be the best parents that we can be for this little one.

So as I've been feeling "flutters", "kicks" or whatever you want to call them (for a few weeks now), I need to come up with a name nickname for this kiddo. Seeing as we decided to not find out what we are having its hard to say Mister this or Misses that... but I've got some ideas, and so do a few others... As of now recent names have been "bean", "it" (as much as I hate referring to him or her as that), "Super Wonder Quad" (thanks Rob's family for that one) and this morning I thought of maybe "Wigglebean" or "Wiggleworm" since just about everyday there seems to be a constant dance party going on in my tummy. I am a part of a "secret" group of women that are all pregnant and due around the same time (between late July and early September) and one of the members mentioned in her weekly photo/journal how the baby feels like a bird pecking away inside, boy could that not be closer to the truth, so with that I could easily nickname wiggleworm to "baby bird" or "little bird".

So this women's group I am apart of - I've had quite a few people say that I shouldn't be in it because I would read into things (as many claim I did early on). For example, early on I was scared that something had happened or that something was wrong since I have had such an easy pregnancy and still continue to do so. I'm beyond that fear now that I have moving proof in me. But back to the topic of this women's/mom's group. I am so happy to be a part of it. I take what I hear with a grain of salt. Let me repeat, I take what I hear with a grain of salt! There has been a lot of useful information within this group, especially from those that have one or more kiddos. I am grateful for this group of knowledgeable women, not to mention its fun sharing in the "hump day, bump day" photos on Wednesdays and seeing everyone grow with their little ones!

So there be my random, very random, thoughts that have been going through my head as of late. This weekend I prepare myself to fly to Myrtle Beach to visit my parents. It will be wiggleworm's first opportunity to hear my mom and dad and I haven't seen them since the cruise, which was before I was pregnant - so I am beyond thrilled to see them!!

With that, I leave you with my weekly photo (sorry it's blurry, Rob apparently can't stand still long enough for it to be clear - LOL!)

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